“Danielle is at the house tonight. Stalker! Stage-five clinger alert!”
- Vinny
Jersey Shore
No Valentine’s Day is complete without a tale about love gone mad.
Vito has turned into a stalker.
He used to follow me around the house like any regular puppy dog. But I always knew he had an agenda.
I feed him, and I prepare most of the meals in our house, so I represent the source of all food. I thought he liked me basically because I was his meal ticket. When he stands between my legs when I’m at the counter preparing a meal, I thought he was waiting for an errant crumb of ground beef to roll off and into his mouth.
Now I’m not so sure.
Lately, his interest in me is becoming weird. He tries to follow me into the bathroom. I push him out, but he waits outside the door. He won’t leave. I think he’s standing guard to make sure I don’t slip out the window to escape his “love.”
Today, the day before Valentine’s Day, he went too far. As I headed in to take a shower, I noticed the shower door was ajar. As I slid it open to turn on the hot water, my heart jumped into my throat.
Vito was sitting in the shower stall. I didn’t even know he was in the bathroom. And only God knows how long he’d been in there … waiting for me.
I ordered him out and locked the door behind me, but I was anxious the whole time in there.
He’s beginning to remind me of another famous shower stalker …Vito is even starting to look like Norman Bates.
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| Norman Bates |
Vito is one of a kind! Love the picture of him in the shower. He has the strangest personality but yet it's oddly endearing. I feel like we should all be scared but aren't for some reason. I always knew those crazy eyes meant something - still not sure what though exactly. I just love him and don't know why. He's like loving the classic "bad boy". You know you probably shouldn't but you can't help yourself.
ReplyDeleteHa! You know a friend of mine in Ireland says they call stalkers (esp. female ones) "bunny boilers"--after the Dangerous Liasons movie. :)
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